Rant. Vol II

Ok, for those of you who may not have gathered it yet, I am very opinionated. From time to time there are things that will happen where I can not keep my mouth shut, This is such an occasion. All my rants are off the cuff, and unedited so there may be a few typos but oh well. Let's get started.

This recent wave of southern high school ridiculousness is fucking ridiculous. First Constance McMillen is denied access to her prom, because she wants to bring a female date, now there is another kid, Derrick Martin. The good news is that he is allowed to go to his prom; the bad news is that his parents kicked him out of their house because of “all of the media attention.” Now I am hearing that Amber Duskin, some little Ann Coulter wannabe and a student at Daniels high school, has organized a protest against Daniel.

Amber Duskin claims that she did this because of the media attention as well. In her interview she said, “I don’t believe in going up there and dancing with gay guys like that,” she said. “It’s also not just him bringing a boy. It was bringing all this attention to it.”

Excuse me for pointing this out but, you know what else causes media attention? Giving interviews to the goddamn media! If you want to put out a fire don’t throw your homophobic gasoline on it, unless you are covered in it as well.

Man, I'm just going to say it FUCK HER! I feel so bad for Derrick. I didn't even get to go to any high school dance because I didn't want shit like this to happen. Love and let love people. All these homophobes hiding behind their “attention” shyness get to me like the racists hiding behind their tea and health care.

I hope this all works out in a way that Amber Duskin looks a damn fool. I hope his parents loose the love of their son, because they don't deserve it. My heart goes out to Derrick, Constance and every other kid suffering in silence. This craziness must stop right now.

Penis (Click On The Images To Expand Them)

   

Friday Advice: The Motion In The Ocean

I got an email today that asked what is the normal penis size.  So I thought why not make it a full post.

It is a age old question. Is it the size of the ship or the motion in the ocean? Personally I would rather have Pinky and a Brain rather than a Rocky and Bullwinkle, if you know what I mean. I know, as you should as well, that the brain is the biggest sex organ and stimulation of my mind is a must. That is just my opinion and I am sure the multitude of websites and Enzyte commercials would beg to differ. They would have you to believe that if you dick is not 28" with a raging erection at all times then there is something effed up about what you've got going on. The facts, however are not nearly as ridiculous. Fellas grab that tape measure from the night stand... don't worry I'll wait.

The average erect penis is actually about 5.1 to 6.0 inches long and about 4.85in around. Understand that the vaginal canal which goes from the labia minora to the cervix in a woman that is aroused is about 5 to 7 inches. Meaning if you thought having that 28" raging hard on was a good thing, you are wrong. As anyone woman will tell you, your penis stabbing her cervix is not even remotely pleasurable and the mouth can only open so wide. That doesn't mean if your penis is above 6in that you are some kind of freak, there are tons of people who prefer a larger penis.

Thanks for your insight Lady Gaga.

Sure you see a video like that and think ZOMG WTF FML, but really come on. We all know that sex is not all wrapped up in the penis, and if you think it is read this. 

If you feel that you are inadequate, ask you partner how they feel. If your partner says your penis is plenty, then take that to be the truth. If your partner says that you are inadequate, then one he/she is a douche for letting you continue to do a lackluster job and two it think T-Boz of the famed R&B group TLC said it best in their hit song 'Girl Talk', "If you ain't swinging, jut put your tongue in it."... or around it or on it, what ever "it" may be. Take some time to learn what you can do to please your partner(s). I am sure that if they don't know you can have one hell of a time figuring it out together.

Look forward to next week when we talk about non-penetrative sex,  foreplay, and erogenous zones. For more info on penis size visit Wikipedia

Attack of The Killer Kung-Fu Wolf Bitch

                     

I got together a crack team of guys who worked as my panel. We sat down together in the man cave and we had a chat. I posed the question, "Do you think the y chromosome is degrading?" Most of the experts initially replied with, "what?" I further explained that the question simply sought an answer to if men felt that their position in the world is being eliminated or diminished by the increasing social equality of women. Their faces scrunched into origami and braille that read deep of confusion and surprise.

Eventually one of them opened their mouth and began a hour long conversation in which we covered many topics. However the answer to original question one that was not actually with words. It was answered with what my panel did not say. They did not once mentioned they felt encroached upon by womens increasing equality. So what did they say?

They said that sexual harassment cases and gender offense sensitivity were becoming both annoying and ridiculous. A court case against Burger King over referring to their company standard red cleaning cloth as a red rag, and a case against a mall for a Santa Claus saying "Ho ho ho" where both referred to. They all agreed that they sometimes feel uncomfortable in social situation with women, because they fear offending the opposite sex. I found that there was a small bit of resentment in the forced political correctness. This wasn't solely about gender it extrapolated out to other areas of social deviation.

So what does this say about our generation? I would venture to asses that for our generation gender is not as much of a social divider as it once was. Men are not considering their status as man based upon simple social interactions with women. They are probably looking to more academic or intragender competitive activities for that reinforcement. In terms of romantic interactions with women my experts unanimously agreed that they were able to separate their feelings and behaviors from their social interactions.

In summary the war is over, everybody won, we can all go home now. I am not so quick to believe that it is though. Everyone of my geniuses are all college educated, ages 18-26, varying races and social backgrounds. However I have a sneaking suspicion they might not be representative of the general public. So guys what do you have to say? Leave a comment below, email me @LTASEXinfo@gmail.com or on Twitter @ltasex

FML: Male Expectations

These are from FML.com and I just wanted to use them to illustrate that the requirements I talked about yesterday still apply.

Today, I watched Cast Away with my girlfriend after not seeing it for a year. I forgot how sad it was when Wilson "dies" at the end. I cried. My girlfriend told me to man up. FML

Today, a wasp flew into my room. While I, a 6'2" hockey player, cowered in the corner, my 4'11" girlfriend killed it. FML

Today, I was at the gym with my boyfriend. He is a bit feminine, but it has never really bothered me. Until I realised I was lifting heavier weights than he was. FML

Today, I went to the pharmacy and asked the very attractive pharmacist what to do about the terrible itching under my cast. She told me to be a man and deal with it. FML

Today, I went out to eat with a group of couples and my boyfriend. All my friends boyfriends paid for them. Mine didn't, and said that I should order off the diet menu. FML

XY

This entire week is going to be dedicated to the Male of our species. We are going to cover everything from Penis size to their hopes and dreams. Enjoy.

 So where to we start? I think we should start with what makes a male. Technically a male human must have testes and a penis at birth. This does not however take into account the social aspects of what defines a human male. This is what we are going to explore.

You've heard the adage you're born a male, you are made a man. This is absolutely true. From birth we are bombarded with images of what a proper Man should be. The pressures are from our parents, media, and other children. It is impossible to escape the gender molding. This is not necessarily a bad thing as for a lot children being "normal" is a major priority.  Without these norms we would not have that social safety.

Eventually we all go through puberty, and develop all the secondary sex characteristics we normally associate with being a man. In general by end of puberty, around age 18, we have developed our idea of self. This includes our idea of where we fit into our gender and how our gender identity fits into our sexuality. 

For heterosexual men, falling into a dominant social role comes easily. This is a factor of gender and romantic interactions that have allowed for a greater growth of self.  Those heterosexual men who fall into a more submissive and or feminine gender role may have difficulty in adjusting to the expected roles of his gender.


For homosexual men this development is often retarded by a lack role models and romantic relationships. Therefore it is often a lot harder for them to develop a solid and polar gender role, like their heterosexual counter parts. This often leads into the same issues of heterosexual men with a submissive/feminine identity in terms of social guidelines.





Some of the traits socially expected of men include: physical and mental strength, stoicism, endurance, dominance, financial security, domestic ineptitude, and sexual indescrimination. All of these are in comparison to the female human and do change with age.

It is understandable that with the great mass of people in this country there is bound to be a few men who do not feel they fit into this profile of what a man is. This can cause many different emotional and mental changes that can affect one negatively.  

What do men think about these ideals and norms? Find out tomorrow. We will continue this tread with comments from myself and other men on what they think of themselves, other men, romantic partners social norms, and women.

Are You Ready?

To start off I would just like to say thank you to all my friends and family that have been helping me with the launch of this blog... website... tool. I am really happy to have had so much support, for these past few weeks, in putting together this labor of love. It has been a lot of work putting this together, a lot more work than I initially thought but it is paying off.

We are now approaching the official launch of "Let's Talk About Sex: A open and honest conversation about sex and relationships for the Nintendo generation" and I could not be more excited. I have two huge weeks planned for you guys. From Monday March 22nd until Saturday April 3rd we will be having a all out gender battle royale. Well, not so much battle but a sounding board. One of the biggest issues I see between men and women, in all interactions, is that they don't share enough of their thoughts with each other. Even in cases where communications are open, sometimes the partners need to hear other people echo the thoughts of their partner(s) to really understand. Don't worry we are not forgetting my fellow gays and lesbians or those in homosexual relationships as they need to speak to everyone, just as many heterosexuals may have something to say to those of their own gender. So be prepared for that.

I have decided on a MWF schedule for posts. Normally I will post a question on Monday, responses on Wednesday and Friday Advice on... well Friday. Aside from these post I will be peppering bits from around the web, studies, products, news, and hot stories thought out.

I really hope you guys like what I have for you. I really hope that you come to trust and look to me for advice for your lives. I hope that you can gain info that will help you have a better sex life. I hope that we can do everything together wearing a leprechaun hat while wrestling in Jell-O. Most of all I wish you all best orgasms, great sex, great relationships, titillating conversations, and soothing vibrations.

Much Love

J

Friday Advice: Double Scoop of Kinky With Vibrator Sprinkles

"How do you tell your boyfriend that you may want to try some more exotic things in the bedroom. when your guy thinks you're an angel how do you bring up "sex toys " without tainting his image of you?"

-Jive Pineapple

This is a toughy... Well I'm not sure but I think the proper thing to do in this situation is TELL HIM. You should go to him and say, "Hey I would like to try some new stuff in the bedroom. I mean I love vanilla ice cream, but it think I would like to try some rocky road." Just replace rocky road with dildos, handcuffs, nipple clips, whips candle wax or what ever it is that you want to try. However some guys are a little shy about their own desires so saying that out right may scare him off. If this is the case leave rocky road in and then talk to him about what it is that you want to try. You should not worry that his image of you may be tainted. He's your boyfriend and should be down for whatever you want to try, within reason. If he is hesitant maybe you could "accidentally" walk past a sex toy store or he could stumble upon an open browser window of the toys that you would like to use. What ever the case, you two kinky kids need to chat and have a serious discussion about your sex life. Be frank about your desires and let him know what he can do to please you. He may be more open to the idea than you think. In the end use your own discretion and you can't go wrong.

Best Orgasms,
JR

All My Single Ladies (and Gentlemen)

What the hell people? Seriously? Not one? Not a single person objecting to being single? I am very happy :)! I am happy because this means that people are taking advantage of our situation. However this excitement is rolled over like a protester in China circa 1989 by the results of my impromptu poll of 100 people around my college campus.

76% of the people not in a relationship and 41% of those in relationships where actively seeking a relationship.

If someone would have asked me to guess the results, I would have never guessed this. So I wonder... WHY? So I asked why. Why do you want to be in a relationship? What is the draw? Here is what they had to say.

"I mean like, I just like it. I like to have a willing dick around when I want it." Lindsay, 20

"I just broke up with my girl and it's like I was with her for a year. It's too different being single." Dawan, 24

"Me and my boyfriend have been together for years. I don't exactly like being so far away from him [She attends EMU, he attends MSU] but at this point I don't want to break up. I like having him there when I need him. I do, you know, hook up with other guys but that's just cause he's not here." Anonymous Female, 19

"I love my boyfriend, he was my first everything. He is my first love, but we are not compatible sexually. I need someone who is on my emotional level." Anonymous Female, 21

"I have purposely never dated but I think I am ready. I know that I'm young and whatever but I think it's time. I'm not looking to get married, but I do want a girlfriend or at least a few people that I can just date." Francois, 19

These are some of the worst and best answers (my own personal opinion) I could have imagined. I especially appreciate the well reasoned argument from Francois. When I stopped dating I had a similar but opposite reasoning. I completely understand Anonymous Female 19's sentiments but she mentioned that her hook-ups where not known to her boyfriend which is not cool.

From all that I just want to add that if you are in a relationship that fits your needs, whatever they may be, then stick with it. Better yet, use your best judgment. You have every right to choose to be in a relationship that fits your wants and desires. Just keep a constant dialogue going with your partner or partners so that they know they are a notch in your head board or you may become just a line in a song.

"Why are YOU still single?!"

Today on LTASex we are talking about a moment that I am experiencing right now. Being single.

In many ways being single is a great advantage to being paired. For instance if I want to get drunk and slutty or leave my head and my heart on the dance floor, I can. However there also downsides to being single. These basically revolve around not having someone in your corner when you need them or having the empty side of the bed. In my case none of this effects me. (That's a lie. You'll see later.)

In no way am I looking to be paired, but I am not against being paired. At this point in my life, like many of you, I am focused. I am working for my degree, building a career, working on passion projects (like this one), and making sure that I am happy within myself and with the people around me. I am not concerned with dating.

I was talking to a older lady at my favorite coffee shop (shout out to Bombadil's) and we got on the subject dating. She told me about how in her 20 something youth she didn't see their being an option. She finished high school and went to college to find herself a man. She explained, "You kids are so lucky that you have a choice... I went to college and found a husband. I went to the kitchen and found three children. I went to the nursery and found that this was not the life that I wanted for myself. Unfortunately by then I was stuck." She is just now at 62 realizing her true potential.

What is saddest about her story is that I see so many men and women living or heading towards this life today. The chronically paired, the desperately single, and the living for the ring are all heading towards the world of lifelong dissatisfaction.

We are freaking lucky! We have the ability to go out, build a life, have experiences, fuck up, try again, fuck up some more, see the sights, smell the scents, taste the tastes of life. Neither me or you, at this point in our life, should be worried about marriage or any serious dating.

You should be having sex, lot's of sex with lot's of different people. You should try dating, flirting, exploring, and experiencing other people. I guarantee that if you do you will be a happier 40 year old married person. You won't look back at your life say I should have, I could have. You will look back and say wow shouldn't have done that one and how much fun was that.

To be honest, there are nights like these when I sit at home alone scrolling through my Palm Pre's contacts and thinking about how nice it would be have some one to cuddle with. There are nights when  I would rather send a text to a loved one rather than troll the internet for porn or a hook up. Those nights are rare. Most nights I go to sleep content, single, happy and loving the life I'm leading.  I have good friends, good laughs, good food, and good sex. What else does 22 year old me need?

I know I'm going to get responses that label me a hippie. Let me be clear I have never and will never be associated with and hippitry. Hippies are jobless, unbathed heathens and they have no place in our society (joking). I am just a person who understands that the media sucks, and some of our parents suck! The media bombards kids with the ideas of marriage as the ideal but doesn't teach us how to get there. They also refuse to acknowledge that maybe marriage isn't for everyone and that maybe there is more to life. This is why we have to take the time to figure out who we are and where one or more romantic partners may fit into our lives if at all.

I want to know what you think.  Send me an email @ LTASexINFO@gmail.com twitter @ LTASex and now on Facebook search Let's Talk About Sex.

PS.

I AM NOT against monogamous hetero normative relationships even at our age. I AM for making informed decisions and choosing what is best for you now but understanding how it may affect your future. Use your best judgement, and if you fuck up it's ok you can probably try again.